I have been getting several phone calls and emails checking in on us. Evidently several of our posts haven’t been notifying all of you. Many people have called to ask why we haven’t written this month! I wrote to the carepage support team to alert them and hopefully you all will be able to receive your notifications. The daily entries have posted if you want to look back.
I continue to be surprised not only by how many of you are following Corey daily (for 2 years) but this past week we have 8 new carepage friends; 1300 strong! Seeing your names, reading your notes and watching new friends join the page means more than we can tell you. We are truly grateful for your friendship, prayers and support.
Corey and I have been reading articles and books about TBI survivors for a few months now. She enjoys hearing everyone’s story. She doesn’t comment or ask questions as I read but if we get interrupted, she reminds me of the sentence I left off at ~ verbatim. I asked her what it’s like to listen to the stories. She told me, ‘I like them. Someday I could be like them’. I asked her what her goal would be. She told me; “to be alone”. Surprised I repeated, “To be alone”? She clarified her wish, “to not have to depend on you for everything”. I assured her, “it will happen, it’s a Matter of Time”.
Although we read the carepage everyday, Corey’s short term memory loss causes her to respond to the page as if she’s heard about it for the first time. If the reading describes her daily activity, she comments; “I did that?” She’s often surprised and elated; “I did not know”! She’s very excited to hear about herself.
This weekend we not only read back pages, we went into the archives of videos. The majority of videos have not been published. It was fascinating to watch her watch the clips. She repeatedly asked, “Who is that” as she pointed to herself. “That’s you”. She watched a person she didn’t recognize and couldn’t connect with. It was as if the person in the video was a stranger; in many ways she is. We were both searching for the words to describe what we were internalizing. She has come so far yet her observations were unsettling for her. “Why am I like that”? For me, I was not only reliving the excitement of discovering the ‘movement of the moment’ but watching her clips seemed like it was filmed a lifetime ago. I was in awe of where she was and how far she’s come. When you are living through a change you think to your self, ‘I will NEVER forget this’. It’s true for the milestones but the videos reminded me of many forgotten moments.
Corey I once heard ‘Life does not follow a straight line’. We have learned ‘any minute life can change direction’. When your accident occurred, I couldn’t comprehend the why’s. I’m not saying that two years later it’s now been revealed but I can tell you that had we not gone through each moment we wouldn’t be where we are today; working with The Brain Injury Association and beginning to work with multiple families as they navigate their new changes.
When we were reading the carepage you asked me; “Can I be like those people”?
I didn’t make the connection, “What people”?
“The people in the stories, when can I help someone else”?
Honey, you help us every day to remember what’s important. To take time to give a “stand up” hug, a smile, a laugh, to appreciate what we have, to work harder when we want to quit and never give up and never give in.
You look back but you never stop moving forward…that’s how you have helped me! I love you, xoxo