Sorry to disappoint you; Corey wore herself out before she could write the carepage…you’re stuck with me again!
We reread the carepages and I read each response for each post she penned. She was all smiles. When I was thru she announced 48 people wrote to her (she was counting)
Can you believe her recent progress? The last few months have been quite a roller coaster but the last two weeks have been filled with surprises. Every day, sometimes every minute in a day, her emotions and behavior can register at opposite ends of her anxiety spectrum; then there are the moments of clarity. Those moments reveal amazing insight as to what recovering from brain injury is really like for her. Corey’s anger, her frustration, her motivation, her inner strength and most surprising, her spirituality is astounding. I’m so grateful she is discovering how to communicate her innermost thoughts including the negative thoughts.
We reflected on her progress as we created todays gratitude list. This nightly ritual is our version of prayer. Once the kids received all their sacraments, I believed it was their choice to practice their faith. Prior to the accident Corey informed me she was an agnostic. I didn’t respond one way or another except to say I hoped she would find a relationship with whatever version of God she wanted to relate to. I could only hope that at the very least, she would continue conversations with God.
A month after the accident, Corey’s friends emptied her locker and delivered her backpack to me. Checking the multiple pockets I stumbled upon her rosary hidden in the inside pocket. A small smile came to me as I replayed her words which contradicted her hidden treasure. As I reflect on my own belief prior to the accident, I thought I had a strong faith in God. The last two and a half years have certainly challenged that conviction.
Tonight I’d like to share a God wink with you.
I spontaneously stopped in to visit a colleague from work. He was not in, however, his wife happened to be in the office; we had never met. After our introduction we shared a cup of coffee. She has followed Corey’s progress from the beginning of our journey. We also share the mother/caregiver role. We discussed the accident, the early days and how an injury like this affects a persons faith. My new friend can empathize with my difficulty believing and/or trusting in God. I explained how I built a wall around my heart. I left prayer to everyone else because I refused to allow myself to feel vulnerable. Trust requires an open heart. My heart still hurts. I did confess that Corey’s ability to express her spirituality with me is helping me become aware of the signs and messages God has been trying to send me. I am beginning to remove my blinders and recognize His words/messages in casual conversations with others. Those messages are telling me He hasn’t left His post at the entrance of the fortress I’ve built.
My friend confessed she has written a number of notes to us but hasn’t found the confidence to press the “send” button. She wanted to write to share that two weeks ago, after reading about how Corey’s behavior has jeopardized her progress in PT, she began praying to Padre Pio specifically requesting to remove Corey’s anxiety.
I stopped her mid sentence, shocked and speechless; “Wait! When did you start praying for her anxiety”? She confirmed it was two weeks ago. Just the day before I was reading the progress notes submitted to insurance. I was concerned the notes from November through February did not show advancement toward the functional improvement goals necessary to award further coverage. I discussed my concern with Natalie. She agreed yet stated “the last two weeks have been much better. For whatever reason, her attitude has been better and her anxiety has been more manageable. If it continues, we’ll get back on track”. The team at Bryn Mawr jokingly credit Corey’s new glasses for the improvement ~ As I listened to my friend I heard His words and felt His wink. Our impromptu meeting was spiritually designed to affirm my friends intention and reveal another brick that could be removed from the fortress wall. As Corey says, “it’s a sign”, xoxo