Hi Everyone,
Yesterday was definitely a Monday! Driving home from Bryn Mawr this afternoon I had a fleeting thought of heading to the airport…I have a credit card and can buy whatever I need when I get to whatever remote hide-away I choose. Sometimes daydreaming can be just as affective as reality…there are no limits to our imagination or creativity to solve a challenge!
Corey is just as frustrated with her therapy. She accepts that this is her daily responsibility but doesn’t want to call it by its formal name any longer. She’s decided we are going to Bryn Mawr to workout NOT do therapy! Whatever we call it is fine with me as long as we keep going!
Corey continues to make progress physically. She is also making progress communicating her needs and emotions. I know many of you are specifically praying for her temperament and frustrations to be lifted so she can find peace. Many more of you are praying her short term memory improves. Although yesterday and today were difficult, she did an excellent job expressing her anger and inner most thoughts.
Example #1; as Corey walks, her brain is sending messages to her entire body. She has to think about all of the following at the same time: directions as to where she’s headed, hold the Moses stick, follow Mom, balance, stand up straight, bend your knees, lift your leg, follow through, heel/toe and now add the distractions of the crowded gym/hallway, strangers walking by her, Natalie physically holding her and walking beside her, the lights, the sounds, now add the fear and anxiety ~ Whoa baby! ~
She was doing a great job. Her motion was fluid, she stood straight and tall; truly it was the best we have seen her walk in a month. Natalie interjected a direction for Corey to move her hip that would improve her gate. Within a second, Corey began repeatedly screaming “Mom” so loudly she startled the staff and patients in the gym. We instantly settled her down asking her to talk it out instead of yelling. Her tone didn’t drop but she did scream what was wrong; “When can we be done this”? “When can I walk by myself down this hall so no one has to help me”?
Natalie and I were thrilled, not that she was upset but that she clearly expressed what her anger meant. Every outburst prior to this was just that…screaming without a clue as to if she was frustrated, in pain or afraid. This was a huge improvement.
Example #2; we were sitting in the cafeteria having lunch. There were 3 people sitting along the wall bench a few tables down from us. Corey took a momentary pause, looked at me and said, “Mom, there are people that look at my arm and think it can’t move. Just because I’m not moving it does not mean I can’t. (She then physically demonstrated the following with the assistance of her right arm) I can lift it, straighten it and move it anyway I want”. I grinned knowing she was subtly showing her voyeurs her capabilities.
She continued; “Mom, just because someone speaks slowly doesn’t mean their brain is slow, too”. “My brain moves very fast but no one can see it”. “Why can’t people look at me and see I am normal and can do whatever I want”?
M – Corey, many of the people we know here watch you walk, eat, drink and talk because they remember you when you couldn’t do anything. They are amazed at your recovery. It’s miraculous and brings such joy, we don’t want to stop watching everything you’re capable of doing!
C – Do we know them (she pointed to the patrons on our Right)
M – No but maybe their family member is here getting better, too.
I shared this conversation with my sister Diane. She added an interesting perspective. She remembers coming to visit us at Bryn Mawr watching other patients that were more advanced than Corey wondering if she would reach the same milestones. In hindsight, it might have appeared that she was staring but in fact she was in a hope-like trance imagining Corey and her future abilities.
Perception is intriguing. It can either be black or white; cup half full or half empty; it can either inspire you or destroy confidence and motivation. Our perception and interpretation of whatever challenge we face will directly correlate to the success or failure of its outcome.
We choose cup half full, xoxo